Roman Reigns Presents: WWE Full Roster Notes and Impressions

Posted in Kulturecade by - October 17, 2017
Roman Reigns Presents: WWE Full Roster Notes and Impressions

A welcoming, soothing chill begins to fill the air with scents of caramel apples, and roast turkey fills the air. Pumpkins appear on more stoops than not, and the trees start their preparation for a long winter’s slumber. Autumn is here, the single beacon of light left in this nightmare of a year that has been 2017. Although we can soon bury our bodies in blankets and fill our souls with soup and pie, 2017 has one final trick up its sleeve.

WWE 2K18 releases today.

2K18 sports a nauseatingly bloated roster of 203 wrestlers, if one includes all variants of each. A rite of passage of sorts of any 2K game is the updated Superstar rating of each wrestler and if the Fox Drama, Empire has taught us, “All roads lead to Roman.”

Roman Reigns is currently the highest rated Superstar on the roster, not only leapfrogging every legend in the game but usurping wrestlers that are just downright better than him. Understandably, for the past million years, the spot at the top of the mountain was held by John Cena, and rightfully so. Part of the mark of a top draw in the professional wrestling industry is not on the ability to make yourself look good, but make your opponent look as good, or better than you.

A few months ago, I was fortunate enough to be in attendance for John Cena vs. Jason Jordan. Despite being a sub-par performer, Cena made Jordan look like the best wrestler on the roster while keeping himself over as the top draw in the company. Although in the end, Reigns was there to make the entire three-hour show revolve around him and his ascension to the upper echelon of all professional wrestling.

With Cena on the outs and Roman very much in, it’s no surprise that he is front and in the roster. However Roman at the tippy top means that some very deserving athletes have gotten the bump. Here are some of the more egregious examples.

Braun Strowman, tipper of ambulances and destroyer of mortals clocks in a paltry 88. Despite nearly killing James Elsworth and snapping the door off the aforementioned ambulance, his rating is right in line with former WWE Heavyweight Champion Dean Ambrose and only one higher than Jake the Snake Roberts. Strowman most recently main evented a Pay-Per-View where he fell to Brock Lesnar, himself a 93.

Strowman’s rating is also below that of Dusty Rhodes who registers a 90. While indeed a legend, I’d be hard-pressed to imagine a situation in which Dusty Rhodes could score a pinfall against one of the strongest men in the world. Finally, Strowman also loses points to WWE’s newest import, Shinsuke Nakamura who tips the scales at 89, despite falling twice to current WWE Heavyweight Champion, Jinder Mahal himself an 88.

Multiple athletes find themselves bogged in the mid-eighties despite deserving of the top spots. The Swiss Superman, Cesaro whimpers in the ring with an embarrassing 86 despite possessing the raw talent of AJ Styles and strength of Brawn Strowman. A man who has twice defeated Cesaro, Chris Jericho only gets one notch above him at 87, despite defeating Roman Reigns for the United States Championship. As a fun aside, Roman’s sell job to that codebreaker remains the highlight of his career.

While on the subject of Jericho, in his most recent run he was involved in several high profile matches, many of which he came out victorious despite sharing the ring with some of the most talented wrestlers in the world. Some matches include Hideo Itami, himself an 81, a rating he shares with Heath Slater and an excellent match against The King of the Cruiserweights, Neville. Even with his raw ability and improved promotional work, this only boosts him to an 84, lower than Bobby Roode, Booker T, and Charlotte Flair.

Legends aren’t immune from the Roman Reigns grading curve. The 1998 edition of Cactus Jack rings in at 89, one point higher than Strowman and much higher than Sami Zayn, who sits at a laughable 84. 98 Cactus was a bit of a career resurgence for Foley and his most popular character. Even after all the bumps and broken bones, Cactus Jack would slaughter Roman Reigns in the middle of the ring and do it with a smile on his face.

As a fan, it gets old having every facet of this product feed into the continued “success” of The Roman Reigns project. High profile wrestlers are fleeing the company as the face of the company gets booed from town to town. This video game is yet another example of The Roman Reigns Wrestling Federation sacrificing all to serve one. For the curious, I’ve included the entire launch roster below, and there are probably a couple of doozies. So for those so inclined, please be aware that there might be some slight SPOILERS.

Finally, friends, I leave you with this, Goldust clocks in at 76 and Goldberg at 92. What a time to be alive.

  1. Aiden English 75
  2. AJ Styles 90
  3. Akam 83
  4. Akira Tozawa 78
  5. Albert 82
  6. Alexa Bliss 85
  7. Alexander Wolfe 78
  8. Alicia Fox 74
  9. Alundra Blayze 85
  10. Andre The Giant 85
  11. Apollo Crews 80
  12. Asuka 87
  13. Bam Bam Bigelow 85
  14. Baron Corbin 84
  15. Batista 92
  16. Bayley 83
  17. Becky Lynch 83
  18. Big Boss Man ’91  82
  19. Big Boss Man ’99  82
  20. Big Cass 84
  21. Big E 86
  22. Big Show 82
  23. Big Show ’00 90
  24. Billie Kay 76
  25. Bo Dallas 75
  26. Bobby Roode 85
  27. Booker T 87
  28. Braun Strowman 88
  29. Bray Wyatt 85
  30. Bret Hitman Hart ’97 92
  31. Bret Hitman Hart ’98 92
  32. The Brian Kendrick 76
  33. Brie Bella 78
  34. British Bulldog 84
  35. Brock Lesnar 93
  36. Brutus Beefcake 84
  37. Buddy Roberts 80
  38. Butch 75
  39. Cactus Jack ’92 86
  40. Cactus Jack ’98 88
  41. Carmella 79
  42. Cedric Alexander 76
  43. Cesaro 86
  44. Chad Gable 81
  45. Charlotte Flair 85
  46. Chris Jericho 87
  47. Chris Jericho ’00 88
  48. Christian 85
  49. Curt Hawkins 72
  50. Curtis Axel 78
  51. Dana Brooke 75
  52. Daniel Bryan 91
  53. Darren Young 77
  54. Dash Wilder 81
  55. DDP ’92 80
  56. DDP ’98 89
  57. Dean Ambrose 88
  58. Diesel 89
  59. Dolph Ziggler 83
  60. Dude Love 85
  61. Dusty Rhodes 90
  62. Earthquake 82
  63. Eddie Guerrero 91
  64. Edge 91
  65. Ember Moon 78
  66. Emma 75
  67. Enzo Amore 74
  68. Epico Colon 77
  69. Eric Young 81
  70. Erick Rowan 76
  71. Fandango 79
  72. Finn Bálor 88
  73. Finn Balor Demon 92
  74. The Godfather 83
  75. Goldberg 92
  76. Goldust 76
  77. Gran Metalik 74
  78. Greg Valentine 83
  79. Heath Slater 81
  80. Hideo Itami 81
  81. Ivory 82
  82. Jack Gallagher 76
  83. Jacqueline 83
  84. Jake The Snake Roberts 87
  85. Jason Jordan 80
  86. JBL 86
  87. Jey Uso 86
  88. Jim Neidhart 84
  89. Jimmy Garvin 81
  90. Jimmy Uso 86
  91. Jinder Mahal 88
  92. John Cena 93
  93. John Cena ’06 91
  94. John Cena ’10 94
  95. Johnny Gargano 81
  96. Kalisto 75
  97. Kane 81
  98. Kane ’98 89
  99. Karl Anderson 83
  100. Kassius Ohno 80
  101. Kerry Von Erich 87
  102. Kevin Nash 90
  103. Kevin Owens 88
  104. Kevin Von Erich 86
  105. Killian Dain 78
  106. Kofi Kingston 85
  107. Konnor 76
  108. Kurt Angle ’01 89
  109. Kurt Angle ’06 91
  110. Larry Zybysko 84
  111. Lex Luger 86
  112. Lita 84
  113. Luke 75
  114. Luke Gallows 83
  115. Luke Harper 82
  116. Mankind 89
  117. Mark Henry 82
  118. Maryse 73
  119. Michael Hayes 84
  120. Mickie James 80
  121. Mojo Rawley 80
  122. Mr. McMahon 74
  123. Mr. Perfect 86
  124. Naomi 85
  125. Natalya 83
  126. Neville 84
  127. Nia Jax 83
  128. Nick Miller 77
  129. Nikki Bella 85
  130. Nikki Cross 78
  131. No Way Jose 79
  132. Noam Dar 75
  133. Paige 82
  134. Papa Shango 80
  135. Peyton Royce 77
  136. Primo Colon 77
  137. R-Truth 76
  138. Randy Orton 90
  139. Randy Savage 90
  140. Rick Rude 85
  141. Razor Ramon 85
  142. Rezar 82
  143. Rhyno 81
  144. Ric Flair ’88 90
  145. Ric Flair ’91 90
  146. Rich Swann 78
  147. Rick Martel 84
  148. Ricky Steamboat ’91 90
  149. Ricky Steamboat ’94 86
  150. Rikishi 83
  151. Rob Van Dam 88
  152. The Rock 93
  153. The Rock ’01 91
  154. Roderick Strong 80
  155. Roman Reigns 95
  156. Rusev 84
  157. Sami Zayn 84
  158. Samoa Joe 88
  159. Sasha Banks 84
  160. Sawyer Fulton 69
  161. Scott Dawson 81
  162. Scott Hall 86
  163. Seth Rollins 92
  164. Shane McMahon 84
  165. Shane Thorne 78
  166. Shawn Michaels ’97 90
  167. Shawn Michaels ’98 90
  168. Sheamus 85
  169. Shinsuke Nakamura 89
  170. Sin Cara 75
  171. Stephanie McMahon 74
  172. Steve Austin ’97 92
  173. Sting 89
  174. Sting ’88 90
  175. Sting ’91 90
  176. Sting ’98 92
  177. Sting ’99 92
  178. Stunning Steve Austin 85
  179. Summer Rae 75
  180. Sycho Sid 88
  181. Tamina 76
  182. Tatanka 84
  183. Tatsumi Fujinami 87
  184. The Miz 87
  185. The Undertaker 89
  186. Titus O’Neil 77
  187. TJP 79
  188. Tommaso Ciampo 79
  189. Triple H 89
  190. Triple H ’01 91
  191. Triple H ’98 88
  192. Trish Stratus 85
  193. Tye Dillinger 80
  194. Tyler Breeze 79
  195. Typhoon 82
  196. Tyson Kidd 76
  197. Ultimate Warrior 91
  198. Undertaker 93
  199. Undertaker ’00 90
  200. Vader 89
  201. Viktor 76
  202. Xavier Woods 83
  203. Zack Ryder 81
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This post was written by

He is the senior editor at Kulture Shocked. A Nebraska boy born and raised, where he spends most of his time as a writer. When not tearing up Xbox Live, he spends most of his time divided between Magic: The Gathering and his fiancee.

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